Escape From Swansea!

It seems like I can’t get a break from football this summer, which is fine by me! The big news for Latics fans is that club legend Roberto ‘Bob’ Martinez has returned to take over as manager following Steve Bruce’s decision to move to Sunderland.

This is a great move for the club with Martinez well known for having his players playing ‘good football’. After a few years of ‘hit and hope’ with Paul Jewell and Bruce, hopefully this will be the start of something new. Although don’t forget, it seemed everyone had orgasms about West Brom ‘playing good football’ – but they went down in 20th place last season.

Of course, this is a clever ploy for Latics’ chairman Dave Whelan to ‘play up’ to the fans, who have criticised him this season for his ‘penny pinching’ and naming stands after rugby players. But it’s a ploy which has been pulled off successfully, with fans really looking forward to the new season now. With Bruce, it was different.

Which brings me to the reactions of fans. We lost Steve Bruce and his staff to Sunderland, a club that finished below us last term, but we hardly cared. Championship club Swansea, lose their manager to Premiership Wigan Athletic and their fans go off on one, calling Martinez some awful names in the process. Am I missing something here? Roberto Martinez, a Wigan Athletic legend, returns to the club and Swansea fans think he’s a ‘Judas’ for leaving to manage a Premier League club?

Maybe they can’t get over losing their manager to ‘little’ Wigan - it must be. If he went to Sunderland or Portsmouth, they wouldn’t complain. Despite Latics showing themselves up with the whole deal, which involved a phantom press conference, a no show from Martinex or Whelan as Swansea demanded more money, we’ve done everything right in the book to secure the signing of Martinez. So those abusive Swans fans can just piss off and concentrate on burning virgins in giant wicker men instead!

Bob will be joined at Latics by another legend, goalscoring hero and all-round nutcase, Graeme Jones. I just can’t wait until someone like Marlon King rubs him up the wrong way. Marlon will be left wondering where his teeth had gone, when he’s in the dock for his upcoming ‘assaulting a woman’ case. But seriously, Jonesy is a ‘proper’ footballer, he expects 100% effort and will get it out of his players too - they’ll get nutted otherwise!

So with everyone looking forward to the new season, let’s hope Bob can bring in a couple of good players, so we can push forward. Whatever happens, it’s going to be yet another funny old season!

There's nothing left for me to say apart from - Welcome home Bob and COME ON LATICS!