Balls, Balls and More Balls

So I’m watching the draw for the 2010 World Cup, in between making my tea and texting. I can’t help but notice that apart from Charlize Theron being a fit piece, that this draw is an utter mess. I grew up loving watching the FA Cup draw, were balls were just pulled out of a bag. In a World Cup draw - all the balls are put in ‘pots’ and are ‘seeded’, god knows what Alan Titchmarsh must be thinking.

I understand that this is done so each group would have teams from different continents playing each other, but it’s the way they go about it that bothers me. Draws for cup competitions should be simple affairs, not all glitter with a b-list actress doing the draw. 100’s of people had to be drafted in to help the draw run smoothly, whilst a week previously the FA Cup draw was done in a room with 3 blokes. That’s how draws should be, save the spectacular stuff for the opening ceremony. Oh how I’m looking forward to that…not!

England have got a ‘favourable’ draw and will play the likes of the USA, Algeria and Slovenia. I’m happy with this draw and I was delighted to draw the Americans. Despite the ‘special relationship’ between the two nations, I always love any encounter with the yanks - hopefully this time we can beat them! It’s just a shame that 85% of America doesn’t give a toss about football, or ‘soccer’ as they call it. It’s equally a shame that 85% of those in England watching the football in June, won’t have a fucking clue about football, or ‘footie’ as they call it.

We should get through, but the upmost respect must be shown to these teams. USA have some quality players playing in England, Algeria are a decent African outfit and Slovenia beat a very good Russian side to qualify via the play-offs. Hopefully we can avoid any banana skins and more importantly - get the yanks back for making most of their 80’s films run with a anti-communism theme. I believe if you even say ‘communist’ in America - you’ll be put in irons as quickly as you say ‘it’s a joke, no don’t touch me there’!

During the glitzy affair that was the World Cup draw, another glitzy affair was underway to unveil the brand new World Cup ball. Eh? It’s a football, not a frigging rule change! All this attention on a football – it’s laughable! Apparently the ball is called ‘Jabulani’, which means ‘bringing joy to everyone’ in Zulu. I wonder how the other 10 official languages of South Africa feel about that?

Needless to say that this new ball is apparently ‘the roundest yet’, so you’re saying that they played with a square ball in the 50’s? I don’t understand how you can get a round ball to be even rounder than it already is! Still, this ball isn’t a patch on my favourite tournament ball – the England Euro 96 one. I know it’s a biased claim, but I have fond childhood memories of me kicking it around the field and being very careful not to bounce it on tarmac, in case it got scraped. That lasted all of 2 weeks, until the artwork started to fade, as did England’s hopes of wining Euro 96! Sorry, I had to try a bit of poetry there!

Reports that the Euro 96 ball was named ‘Get in the net, you f***ing t**t!’, haven’t been confirmed.

Whatever happens, lets hope England have a good tournament. I’m not making any predictions, as I hate doing that, but fingers crossed we’ll progress through the group stages, as after that – anything could happen.

Another exit on penalties then?

Taken from my personal blog - Sex and the Mudhuts